rediscovering eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
whom shall i fear
whom shall i fear
i am yours
dailies
Monday, July 21, 2003
-12:01:00 a.m.
hey! guess most of u must b surprised 2 c mi blog esp since i dun haf a computer @ home but yes, i haf my ways...*evil grinz* no lar, *haha* i'm @ ma daddy's office now so i'm using his computer!!! i noe, all u pple r going..."u daddy's gurl..." *heehee* but i LYK being ma daddy's gurl...hey, i've been deprived 4 7 months man!!! sumhow, seeing sum pple juz makes mi realize how much i actuallie miss them...i mean, i knew i missed them wen i hafn't seen them 4 so long yet after sum time, the feeling kinda subsided u noe? den i dun realli tink so much bout it n live my simple ordinary life in canada...
actuallie cum 2 tink about it, my canadian life realli had been tough, but sumhow i managed 2 survive...i mean, can u imagine going 2 skool 4 1/2 a yr w/out a fren @ all? ok, so mayb i haf "frenz" but "aquaintances" is a more suitable word 4 them...n even "aquaintances" i onlie haf 4 so it was realli quite a drastic change 4 mi, considering the fact tt i definitely had more than 4
frenz here wen i left...but the ting izz, wen i look @ the positive side of things, not hafing frenz izzn't realli all such a big deal...i mean, i haf a lot less frenship problems than sum of the pple i noe n i never haf 2 worry bout my frenz only being surface frenz or peer pressure or wutever :) ok, so y shld i be complaining???!!! yeah lar...i guess the loneliness juz creeps up 2 mi sumtimes n c-ing other pple in my skool all in cliques while i am the loner realli changed my perspective...i guess now i can realli empathize w/ loners huh? :) *heehee* hmm...mayb next time i mite end up as a counsellor n this experience could help w/ it *grinz*
so aniwae,
AIYOH!!!!! i digressed so much again.........wut i was trying 2 sae was tt my life in canada was realli simple too though, no "emotional manipulation" (as clara calls it!!!) n juz live each day as it goes...no stress, ok teachers whom u dun even need 2 listen 2 but still ace the subjects :) so yar, if u tink about it, life's supposedly pretty good...but i tink i've lost sth: my emotions...over there, i've learnt 2 control my emotions so well it's realli...almost gone...coz if i dun do tt, i mite haf end up suffering frm depression...i guess i'm realli quite an emotional person so it would've been too overwhelming 4 mi...
yet sumhow, cuming back here had switched my "OFF" button to "ON" again...i dunno y, i feel tt so far this 1/4 of my trip had made mi "feel" more than being "really there"...u noe wut i mean? it's lyk, i feel as though i've submerged myself in2 my inner emotions more than concentrating on being there...so i realli shld bring maself out soon b4 i spend n waste the whole of my highly-anticipated trip
IN myself :P *haha* i tink most of u haf no idea wut i'm toking about!!! oh well!
oh yeah...i'm realli glad 2 c all of u again, tout i shld let u noe :) it's been nice...n i can tok as long as i want on the fone w/ everyone (tupperware!!!!!) w/out feeling bad about the fonebills!!! :P yet tings haf changed...u noe, sumtimes i felt as though i've been in a time warp...lyk i was in a dream all along but yet wen i wake up, everything's different...coz 2 mi, my frenz r still tt closely-knitted bunch i remember @ the airport n i had expected 2 cum back c-ing u all still lyk tt, it's foolishness on my part...n i never came 2 the realization tt we've (or u've all) grown apart alreadi till i saw it 4 myself, everyone has different n new frenz alreadi n i guess i shld start 2 accept tt (though it kinda makes mi feel lyk a failure!!!)...it's juz tt it's kinda a blow 4 mi 2 c everyone not so close animore...but i can handle it lar :)
oh well...i tink i shld get going now, it's almost 2pm n i gotta go 2 SAM 4 my date w/ mr tan *ahahahahahahahahahaha!* nah...time 2 c my darling garden!!!!!!!!!!!! *grinz*
oh hey! u guyz wanna cum 4 the exhibition? got my garden leh!!! opening ceremony on thursday...oh yah...4got, all u pple da mang ren (big busy pple) mayb still hafing skool...:(
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Sunday, July 20, 2003
-10:53:00 p.m.
Is your birthday day 16 of the month?
Your Life
You always follow the good and the right instead of listening to your heart. Another word, you are a perfectionist. You care for every word people say about you. You often seen isolated while you are, by nature,
curious and a dreamer who is ready to get over the edge to make your dream comes true.
Your Love
You often fall in love with a person who is much different from you, in age and other aspects. Your relationship grows on friendship. Love at first sight is not your style.
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Tuesday, July 08, 2003
-6:54:00 p.m.
1. my flight's been delayed (sorry guys!!!)
2. so i'm flying 2moro morning n reach s'pore on thursday midnite instead
3. i'm feeling so exhausted though i've not been on the plane.....
4. argh...i could haf been on my japan to s'pore plane by now.....................
You are an Amethyst. You are quiet and tend to be
shy. You don't like attention to be pointed
towards you, yet your beauty and uniqueness
draw people to you.
What Jewel Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
??????????????????????????????????????
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Sunday, July 06, 2003
-11:50:00 p.m.
yoz! i tink this izz gonna b my last post online 4 quite a LOOOOOOOOOONG time coz i'm finally going back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (my computer's here so we dun haf internet in s'pore now :) *i luff my new computer!!!!*grinz*)
but aniwae! i haf the whole of 2moro 2 pack n do all the last minute stuff b4 flying off on the morning of tuesday!!! it's actualli kinda egg-citing coz i hafn't flown w/out the supervision of adults b4 :) i mean, i've been overseas TONNES of times w/out my family (lyk wen i was 4, my aunt brought mi over here 2 canada...) but never w/out ani adults so it's kinda scary as a first-timer! yeah i guess i'm a lil scared tt i'll screw up n leave my passport sumwhere tt kinda ting! but it's oso realli egg-citing!!!! i feel so independent man!!! *muahahahaha!* as if i've all grown up n all *grinz* (but of coz...we all noe better...!!*haha!*) yah, tinking of flying alone (ok, wif my sista too but yar...!) izz actualli wut makes mi the most excited...i dunno, i'm
REALLY REALLY REALLY psyched 2 c my parents n everybody but i'm oso kinda scared of how everything will turn out (clare will noe!!! *grinz*) well...i guess i'll juz haf 2 take it as it goes aye? :) no worries!!!!
ok, but i tink i shld tell u guyz tiz: i'm touching down on s'pore on the midnite of july 9 (wich izz wednesday nite n thursday morning) so yar, dun tink ani of u can cum 2 the airport so late!!! it's ok though :) coz i'll probably look REAL terrible after the flight so i dun wanna gif ani of u an heart attack tinking tt i've becumed a witch or sth *grinz* yap! but i appreciate it
:) can't wait 2 c u guyz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh yar! hey all CJ pple listen up!!!!! i tink i mite visit CJ on fri, i dunno, but i'm kinda planning on it :) i'll probably call u guyz first b4 doing aniting so yar!!! but the rest of u, i'll b callin u all!!!!! dun 4get 2 stay by the fone hor!!!!!!!!
ok...i guess i shld big my dear veri-neglected blog farewell...*sob!* :) i'll c u in a while!!!!!!
*smuackx!!!*
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Wednesday, July 02, 2003
-2:48:00 p.m.
*AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
everybody: let's all count down 2 july 9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(tt's 1 week frm now rite???? *grinz*)
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