rediscovering eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
whom shall i fear
whom shall i fear
i am yours
dailies
Monday, February 07, 2005
-4:46:00 p.m.
HARLOW!!! ok it's truly been a while since i've blogged *haha* it'll be amazing if anyone actualli reads this coz i bet u all gave up on my blog already! :D but anyways, 1st things 1st:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLAREY!!!!
i miss u loads man...miss talking 2 u on the phone *whines* but i'm glad i got u in the morning though!!! *heehee* even if i wasted the chance of waking u up with the phone :D (yes that was my true purpose!!! *haha!* bet u figured out already ^.^)
then oh yes, i was over @ toronto the past week, left on friday the week before and came back wednesday night last week coz i was attending my grandpa's funeral over there...mm...my mum actualli left way earlier when she heard that he was realli ill, then she was there when he died...i'm really glad that she got 2 see him one last time :) my uncle, my 4 lil cousins, my dad and i flew over after that 2 attend the funeral...n it was actualli an eyeopener 4 me! *haha* felt as tho i've learnt alot this trip *lol* i noe it's weird 2 say it's educational but it is! coz 4 one, it's my first funeral...i mean, i tink i've been 2 one before but i was like, 4? i dunno, around there...n i can't remember much bout that one except i was forcing myself 2 cry *LOL!* yeah, and i din cry this time either *haha* partly coz i'm not close 2 my grandpa...but my cousins over @ toronto were saying that he's realli nice 2 them so i guess he is! *haha* i mean, everytime he came over 2 singapore b4, he never realli talked 2 me and effie...mayb our family is just realli insignificant in the extended family *haha* but still, i remember my grandpa as being realli generous, and he loved 2 eat and he loved 2 swim and he was actualli a pretty suai grandpa! :P as in, he's pretty good looking 4 an old guy *heehee* but i guess that's about all i can remember about him...
i dunno, going over there realli made me wish that i grew up with my relatives...or just somewhere where i had my extended family with me...i mean now, my relatives r juz so distant 2 me...it's weird how we're so related and yet i know nothing about them :( i dunno how 2 express this feeling in english...but in jap, it's like, ほんとにたいへんです...like my aunties and uncles were actulli saying 2 me, i dunno much about u but since u like studying and reading so much, u shld study things like literature and history, u noe, art courses and stuff since u dunno what 2 do in uni...and i'm juz like thinking, what are u talking about? since when did i like studying and reading? i never did since young...and they probably just built an impression of me coz my results have always been pretty decent and assume i'm a nerd or sth...ok i guess i can't blame anyone bout that, but i realli wish i grew up on toronto or hong kong where there's older pple hu've watched me grow up from young and i have cousins and frenz that i've played with since young, my cousins over there are so close and i long so much 4 that *haha* actualli i've been longing 4 that since i came here and seeing close cici, manda and kristi are *heehee*
still, meeting my cousins is pretty cool, except they're all pretty much older now, i'm the 2nd youngest of the older lot of the cousins *haha* effie's the youngest obviously! but i actualli didn't get 2 talk 2 them alot, especially kathleen and calvin, coz i mean, it's only like the 2nd time i've met them rite? talked 2 christina and alfred alot more, partly coz i'm originally closer 2 them, like i've seen them alot more coz the last few times when i came over 2 canada i'm always hanging out with them so yeah...they're cool :) plus, alfred's the same age as me and christina's a few years older so i guess the age gap's smaller in comparison! but yeah, the four of them are like, my idea of CBCs since i came 2 canada in sec 1 2 visit man...they're the kind of canadian chinese that i've always wanted 2 b...they're juz different from the ones here in edmonton somehow *haha* here's juz like, total FOBness *lol*and oh man, kathleen is SO. GORGEOUS. it's so hard 2 believe tt we're related...*haha* coz she's like, so pretty and she has the best figure AND she's smart (she's a lawyer, i tink she just graduated or sth) and she's realli nice too! realli, i was so stunned @ first *haha* and calvin's cute too, baby face!!! (well ok, aunt ella's realli pretty so it makes sense!) but he's supposedly realli kiddish *haha* i dunno, he and alfred's like, the ultimate crappiness together *haha* they're awesome, i juz wish i knew them better...well...mayb i can go over 2 toronto more often 2 visit now that i'm living in edmonton...except they've all moved away too *haha* they juz came back 4 the funeral as well...kathleen's living in downtown toronto, calvin's in oakville, christina's in vancouver and alfred's in hamilton -_-" so wut's the point of going down 2 mississauga then? oh wells...hu noes, mayb there's still chance of me getting 2 know them better *haha*
anws, yeah, after the funeral b4 i left, christina and alfred brought me over 2 macmaster 2 check out their campus...IT'S SO PRETTY!!! ok, i've heard that western ontario's even better but macmaster's not bad! they've loads of trees and stuff *haha* except alfred's dorm kinda stinks *lol* as in, literally stink stink *haha* then what else...oh yes! i actualli managed 2 go shopping 4 a couple of hours as well! in vauhan mills or sth, they're supposedly realli huge, like if u took away all the crappy stuff in WEM, they're supposed 2 b even bigger than WEM! plus, it's a new mall! man i got this coat from tristan & america that was originally $225 for $10 and a GUESS jacket that was $158 for $24!!!!!! is that cool or is that cool *haha* except i din even have 2 pay 4 that, coz my aunties were paying 4 me :D *heehee* i guess i dun mind pampered once in a while!!! *grinz* that was juz awesome *heehee* and christina's sucha great shopping partner!!! man next time i go shopping in toronto, i've GOT 2 ask her 2 bring me out :D
wow i realized that this is long *haha* but i've actualli got more stuff 2 say...*lol!* went 4 kristi and jennifer's party on friday, about a day after i came back :D it was fun man!!! *haha* yeah it was super great @ 1st, then i heard some not so nice stuff wich kinda killed my mood 4 a period of time, but then it became ok again later coz :D then me and effie stayed over @ her house coz we din want our dad 2 come fetch up so late...and so did david, jonathan and jennifer *haha* kristi, david, jonathan and me were like, playing bridge the whole night man! i din even notice it was the next morning coz we juz kept playing and playing *haha* but nobody won in the end coz we broke even *haha* then ended up sleeping @ 6am coz we couldn't stand it, actualli no la, we made a bad choice of watching anime when we're so tired *haha* so then we slept...then kristi, david and jon woke up @ 7 coz effie had 2 go 2 work so she drove them all out 2 WEM...i slept till 12 but i was still SO exhausted *haha* lessons were ok tho, coz i told them i din get 2 practice coz i was over in toronto *heehee*
oh man...i tink i've been too distracted and daydreaming too much lately tt i hafn't made any effort 2 improve on my social life in skool o.o *oops* i mean, i juz dun realli care that much animore 2 go and initiate talking 2 pple (i mean, since nobody ever initiates talking 2 me rite? it's all my responsibility 2 get 2 know them) so yeah...i mean, ok...the usual, i talk 2 pple in my classes and that's about it...i realli shld go join sth 2 get some stuff going outside classes *haha* but there isn't much skool spirit around here...uni's juz a place that pple come 2 take courses...that's it...so i'm confused...how did all these other pple get so tight?
anws ok la, this is way too long...i'm honoured if u actualli read all of this! *haha* thnx 4 bearing w/ me man!!!! i'll tty guyz later!!!
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